i return
thinking of you all of you every single one of you.
it was just a few days ago that somebody shared a little episode of his life with me. his wife had just told him to listen to himself, and he had just said that failure was not a possibility. i looked at him, said nothing, and thought how i had once told myself that i was damned to succeed. we were talking about the need to balance paradoxes and of just being with what is present; the need of not knowing. it was a very intimate and private conversation. it does me good to have such conversations, i need those. intimate and private conversations are not personal, they are natural consequences of just being alive and authentic, they happen spontaneously.
i thought of you, and i thought of the logistics of our lives and the sheer madness of our lack of compromise. i wouldn't want anything else. just yesterday i was thinking about the thousand things that i want to share with you. i do not know if ever we will. failure here is a possibility although my wonderful ego would rather cling to it all, let go of nothing, and sell my soul in the process. we want all of it, there is nothing to sell. nothing to cling to.
just thinking of you.
