the wind gives away its secrets. it tells me your secrets, and it tells me his secrets. the wind tells all secrets. the wind has no secrets, it gives them all away. it is the wind that whispers in my ears. it is the wind that tells me all. how was i to know about the wind?
it was not on a train, it was not under the shower, and it was not where i was looking for it. i often look in the wrong places to find the right things. it was not one, and it was not what i thought it might be: they are stories. it has been more than two years, and i feared the distraction and i denied the distraction. distraction became obsession: i fought. then, within a few days all the pieces of the puzzle fall together: this is the present. one piece of information adjunct to another, the veil falls, the obsession ceases. i am back feeling that fear that i had touched three summers ago.
i want to know how it can be that you love me so when i myself can not even start to believe that love exists?
in the midst of emotional thunder, i call to you. you arrive and carry me on silk and feathers, you turn my fiction into reality. i'll dare you! who has given you permission to love me so?
i did not want love to exist, and i did not want my illusion to shatter. to complain and suffer would be so much easier. to have it be impossible, would have been so much more reasonable! who has given you permission to accept me so?
freedom, you have given me freedom! i'll dare you!
