being with you

last night, miles apart, together.

i wished you here, i wished myself there, i wished nothing at all.

i have missed this place, really have.

i am miles apart from myself, how could i think that i am close to you?

have missed being here with me, really have.

i have noticed my attention fragment at the slightest whisper and i have noticed myself waiver and vacillate. i forget easily, i forget the struggle much too easily, i am so drunk with it all, i am. drunk and here, that i am.

i forget the hardship, i forget the pain. i forget it all so damn quickly, how can i forget so easily? will you tell me?

but why can i not forget you? each time that i meet you, i think that you will be different this time, and then i meet you again and again through time, through space, through fiction, and there you are, always here and always so far!

i did not want a love affair, i didn't. i told you so, didn't i? perhaps i forgot, i always do forget. i even forget the love affairs. i forget all. i forget all of you. all of you.

last night, right here, miles apart, together.

i really do not know.

seduction

another said words seduce

"il faut laisser les fantasmes être des fantasmes"

seduction and magic, he accused.

i stood there, accused and ignorant, you entered and seduced.

magic it was.

pure plain magic, ego magic.

caresses you called the magic

ecstasy i called the caresses

the wind blows the storm nears the desires wane

the desire that unfurls the lust that surrenders the seduction that seduces

the power of silence.

another another time another life another day another

not yet, he said not yet.

ignorant, seduced, and here. magic.

not yet.